


To Be Left Behind

by Lady_Dreamer



Category: The Hobbit - All Media Types
Genre: AU, F/M, duty to the people, someone has to stay behind
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-10-30
Updated: 2014-12-31
Packaged: 2018-02-23 05:30:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2535923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lady_Dreamer/pseuds/Lady_Dreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thorin is preparing to lead an excursion to take back Erebor. After some serious consideration, he realizes that someone must stay behind to lead the people should things end badly.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This has been floating around in my head all day and would not leave.

"It is for the best, Fili. One of us must stay behind for the sake of our people. You are my heir, therefore your duty is to our people first. It is the burden we must bear. I would have you both stay here away from the danger we will face."

"And yet, Kili is still going. You have filled our heads with the glory of Erebor since we were first old enough to understand, and now, as you prepare to take it back, you will deny me the right to bear witness to it."

"Kili goes because he dueled Dwalin and won the right. You have already proven yourself countless times. I would still have you by my side. I cannot, however, dismiss the fact that our people need leadership. Should the worse happen... should we all die, what will become of our people? Though you were young, I know you remember the Battle of Azanulbizar. We lost my grandfather, Frerin, your father, and my father disappeared. I myself could have been lost. No, you must stay behind. You are young yet and will have plenty of time to make your mark. I say this not as your Uncle, but as your head and Prince. Stay here. Lead our people."

"As you wish, my lord," seethes Fili. How could his uncle do this? It was his right, as one of Durins line, to see their home reclaimed. Surely his mother could oversee things until the people could be sent for. They were to have a wizard accompany them. Mahal had to be on their side. If any should remain behind, it should be Kili. He is not even of age yet. Their mother could assist him. Why must it be him?!

Fili makes his way down to the training grounds. He needs to work his anger out. Perhaps he may yet be able to convince his uncle. Before he gets a hit on the dummy, an axe blocks his blow. 

"So, Thorin has told you of his decision then, lad?"

"Did you know about this?"

"He has been discussing it with Balin for a few days now. He didn't want to do it, but considering you are all that is left of the Royal line, something had to be done."

"So you agree with him?"

"I wouldn't say I agree with him. I am a warrior, not a politician. I do see their point, though. This is a suicide mission. You know it is. The odds are stacked against us and when all is said and done, someone will have to lead the people."

"Then let Kili stay behind! He is the younger and he has less experience! I have always been there to protect him. What will he do when I am not there?! Who will watch both their backs?!"

"Kili dueled for the right to go, and won, in front of many witnesses. His honor, and the honor of your uncle, would be called into question. You cannot always be there to protect him. I know you love your brother. I have been through fire for mine myself. Perhaps now is the time to see what he can do. Besides, your uncle will be there. Now, if you want to burn off some of that anger, have a go at me. I hit back."

******************************************************************************************

"Do you hate me, Brother?"

"That is the stupidest thing that has ever come out of your mouth. Of course I do not hate you. I am not even angry with you. I am angry with uncle, but not you. I am the one who goaded you into making the challenge. I honestly wasn't sure you were going to win, but I didn't want you to be left behind. I never thought I would be the one to stay."

"I can stay, Fee. You can go in my stead."

"No. Kee, this is your chance to prove yourself. You cannot truly do that with me around."

"Well, you seem to be singing a new tune. According to several witnesses, you were ready to kill when you left Uncle's chambers."

"I was. Unfortunately, I had a run in with Dwalin, and he spoke sense, which made what uncle said make sense. I do not like it, but I have to accept it."

"And this is why you are the responsible one. Mother is pleased, though she is still very upset that I am going."

"Of course. Your her baby boy. She still thinks you're in nappys. What can you expect with that fuzz you have on your chin."

"Har har har."

'When do you leave?"

"In three days. I had the choice to travel with Uncle or Dwalin to the Shire. I chose Uncle, so we need to leave a few days earlier to make that meeting. You should make it right with him, you know. We will be gone for a while. Do not live with a regret you can prevent."

"Look at you, being all wise. Alright. I'll see him before you leave."

****************************************************************************************

"Mother. What brings you to the lookout?"

"The same thing that brought you: watching them until they are out of sight. I am proud of you, my son. I know you are not pleased with this, but I cannot lie and say it does not give me a bit of peace to know at least one of you are safe. I dare say I will be out of sorts over them being gone on this fools quest. Oh, do not give me that look. I wish to have our home reclaimed as much as the next dwarf, but this is not the way to do it. My only hope is that they return to us."

"They will, Mum. They will."

*****************************************************************************************

"A raven!! A raven from Erebor!!"

"What are you on about, Mother?"

"Fili! It is a raven from Erebor with a message for you! It is in Balin's writing! Quickly, my love, what does it say?!"

"Erebor has been reclaimed....."

"What is it, Fili?! What else does it say?"

"Thorin and Kili have fallen..."


	2. Saying Goodbye

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fili makes it to the mountain.

Erebor didn’t seem as grand as he always thought it would, at least, not compared to the price it had cost him. Fili had dreaded this moment. He knew that as soon as he arrived at the mountain, it would become real. Thorin and Kili were gone, and they weren’t coming back. He still remembers the day, three months ago, when he first received word from Balin. He remembers his mothers cries of grief, her begging him not to go yet. Wait for Spring. But he couldn’t. Balin bade him to come a quick as he could. Decisions needed to be made and the kingship established. This is why he was left behind. He set out with young Gimli, who too had been left behind. They traveled to Rivendale, where they met the Wizard Radagast. Who would have thought rabbit could be such a quick way to travel. 

He could see that extensive repair work had been done to the gate. It would keep them safe for now, but it would be among the first things to be rebuilt. He had no idea what else awaited him. He did know, however, was where he was headed first: to see where his uncle and brother rested. As they drew closer to the gate, he saw Balin and Dwalin waiting to greet him. Balin had a strained smile, but there was relief on his face. Dwalin looked as intimidating as ever. Somehow, Fili knew the old warrior was not going to let him out of his sight. Dwalin swore to protect the line of Durin through Thror, and he was the last of that particular line. Just keeps getting better and better.

“Fili, my lad! It is so good to see you, safe and sound. I wish the circumstances were better. You had a safe trip, yes?” said Balin.

“Can we save the greetings and general news for later? I need to see them, Balin.”

Dwalin stepped up to him. “Aye. We’ll take ye to them.”

********************************************************

Torch light shed an eerie light upon the chambers. It was so quiet, and cold. They had been laid side by side. ’At least they are not alone’ thought Fili. They lay among the kings. Though he was never crowned, Thorin had been king and he deserved it. He did much for his people. 

“I would like some time alone, to say goodbye.”

Balin nodded his head and pulled his brother from the room. Fili turned back to the tombs. Where did one begin to say goodbye?

“You should have brought me with you. I could have protected the both of you. It didn’t have to end like this. But then, I could just a easily be laying right beside you both, I guess. Kili, I remember how angry you used to get when Uncle and I would have to leave you behind. You pouted for days according to Balin and Mam. I now understand how you felt a little bit better. But now, the both of you have really left me behind. How am I to do any of this without you? Thorin, I know you named me as your heir, but I always expected you to marry once we reclaimed the mountain. I never thought I would actually be King! And Kili, who knew me best but you? You always said that you would be there, should Uncle be stubborn enough not to produce his own heir. I wasn’t supposed to do this alone. You have both broken Mam’s heart. I do not think she will recover this time. And then I was foolish enough to run right out the door myself. Before I left, she said she didn’t know if she if she wanted to come back the Erebor. It holds nothing but pain for her. I think she only wishes to not make this real. You know, I allowed myself to think that maybe this was all some joke. A cruel joke, but a joke none the less. That was far easier than the reality that the two of you are gone. 

“It feels like things will never be right again. I do not want to say goodbye. I do not want to be standing here, talking to your tombs. I do not want any of this, but I do want to make you proud. This isn’t what I wanted, but it’s just what it is. I will do my best to bring honor and prosperity back to our people. I promise. I will see you both again one day. Rest well, Uncle. Rest well, my Brother.”


	3. Chapter 3

_Two years later…._

He felt the headache coming. Fili was currently sitting in the throne room, listening to two nobles squabble over a deceased pig. He cut his eyes over to his guard captain, Tauriel. She rolled her eyes at the dwarrow who had asked for an audience to settle this dispute. Many thought it was strange that the position could be held by an elf, but Fili didn’t care. She was there when his brother and uncle fell. She had tried to save them, and had, in fact, already saved his brother once. He remembers the day he met her.

_Flashback_

_Fili had been at Erebor for a little over a week. There was so much to do. The dragon, and his uncles last confrontation with the beast, had caused a lot of damage. It would take decades to restore the kingdom, if not generations. Their main goal now was to make it habitable come spring. It was inevitable that the dwarrow would begin to make their way home. For now, they were focusing on the outer forges, the market place, and homes. Store rooms were also being cleaned out and anything salvageable was being made accounted for, though there was not much. It had been almost two hundred years._

_Fili’s ears picked up a conversation outside his office._

_“Lass, I am not sure that now is the time. He is still taking it all in, as well as starting the process of restoring our home.”_

_“I know, Master Balin, but I promised Kili. Perhaps this may bring his heart a bit of peace as well.”_

_Curious, Fili walked over and opened his door a crack. He was a little startled to see that it was an elf maid seeking him out. What could elf possible want with him? Hadn’t they all gone back to their forest home?_

_“I don’t know. He hasn’t expressed any desire to discuss his brother or uncle, and he has been quick to change the subject when it has been brought up. Give it some more time, Lass.”_

_“Very well, Master Balin. I shall check back with you soon. I am staying in Dale with Lord Bard and his family.”_

_“So, you have decided to make your home it Dale then? Will you not go back to Mirkwood?”_

_“I am no longer welcome there. I stood for you against my King and refused to call you my enemy when he demanded it. Though I have been forgiven, I am not trusted by my Mirkwood brethren. Lord Elrond has offered me a place in his home, Imladris, but I am not ready to settle there. My heart lies here.”_

_Balin nodded his approval. “I will contact you if I am able to bring it to his attention.”_

_“Thank you.”_

_As she turned to leave, Fili felt himself compelled to step into the room. “Balin, who is this?”_

_“My King, I am sorry if we disturbed you. Allow me to introduce Tauriel of Dale, formerly of Mirkwood, dwarf friend.”_

_“It is a pleasure to meet you, your Majesty,” she said with a bow._

_“Dwarf friend? It has been a while since an elf has been named so.”_

_“Your uncle bestowed it upon her before he passed, as well as upon Bilbo Baggins, our burglar. They both preformed great acts in the protection of our people. Tauriel saved Kili from a poisoned orc arrow in Lake Town and later stood with us in the Battle of the Five Armies. She was with your brother when he passed, and she risked her life in an attempt to save your uncle.”_

_The young king felt like the room was closing in a bit. He cleared his throat and motioned for Tauriel to join him in his study. “Please make sure we are not disturbed, Balin. Unless some real emergency comes up, of course.”_

_Balin bowed and left the outer office. Fili and Tauriel made themselves comfortable in a pair of chairs next to the fire. The room was quiet for a few moments._

_Fili cleared his throat again. “So, my lady, what is it that caused you to seek me out? I had heard a rumor that my brother was enamored with an elf. Am I right in supposing you are she?”_

_Tauriel looked at him with pained eyes. “I believe he was, but we were friends, for the brief time we knew one another. If something more could have came of it, we will never know. But, your brother is why I seek you out.”_

_Fili, braced himself. He knew it was a bit cowardly, but he had been purposely avoiding talking of Kili and Thorin. The hurt was still so new, but he somehow knew it was time to start facing the facts. He signaled her to continue._

_Tauriel pulled out a very familiar dagger. Before they had left, both Fili and his mother had bestowed tokens upon Kili, promises to return safe. Their mother had given him a runestone, Fili had given Kili the dagger their father gave him before he left to reclaim Moria._

_“When we captured your uncles company, we confiscated all of their weapons. Once, when I was doing my rounds, I came upon your brother throwing a stone repeatedly into the air. I had stopped to ask what it was and ended up having a rather lengthy conversation with him. He was not what I had always been told dwarves were. Despite my lengthy life, I had never met one before. I began to watch the other members of the company and realized that I had been taught wrong about your people. Kili and I had many conversations during their unfortunate stay. He told me of this dagger. Described it and asked if I could some how return it to you, should they never be released. I told him he would return it to you himself. Not long after, they escaped. It was during their escape that he was pierced with the poisoned arrow. We had captured an orc and he revealed what was to be your brothers fate. My king had ordered the gates shut, but before they were, I retrieved the dagger and made my way down the river._

_“I next encountered your brother at Lord Bard’s house in Laketown. I was able to heal him, right before the dragon struck. I returned your dagger to him. I accompanied him and the remnants of Laketown to Erebor. When the battle lines were drawn between the elves and men against the dwarves, I refused to fight. I did not agree with your uncle, but I could not bring myself to fight against them. When your uncle and his company joined the battle against the goblins and orcs, your brother and I fought side by side. We were overwhelmed and he took arrows to the chest. I dispatched the surrounding enemies, but there was nothing that could be done. I held him as he passed from his world. He asked me to return the dagger to you, and that he was sorry that he couldn’t keep his promise. That you would be a great king one day.”_

_Both had tears in their eyes. They sat in silence for a while. Fili finally accepted the dagger from her hand. “Thank you, Tauriel. I am glad he had a such a good friend by his side.”_

_Tauriel nodded her head in thanks and both went quiet again. After a moment, the elf maid gave a quiet laugh. “What is it?” asked Fili._

_“There was one more thing, but I hesitate on whether or not it is appropriate right now.”_

_“Let’s hear it.”_

_“Kili said ‘this had better earn me a monument or something. And for Mahal’s sake, give me a beard!’”_

_Fili promptly burst out laughing. He laughed long and hard, but it felt good. “Kili, a jokester to the end.”_

_“Yes, he had a great laugh and his smile could light a room.” Tauriel reached in her pocket. “I also have the runestone for your mother. Do you think it would be more welcomed coming from you?”_

_“No, Kili asked you to do it, so you should. It shows you are a friend and will no doubt offer her a bit of comfort, though I do not know how long you will have to wait. I am not sure she ever plans to return. Balin said you attempted to save Thorin, too?”_

_“Yes, the skin changer and I fought our way to him. He defeated Azog, but he was badly wounded. I think it was the knowledge that Kili did not make it that caused him to give up. He, too, said you would be a great king, that you would serve your people well.”_

_Fili studied Tauriel for a moment._

_“Tauriel, what did you do in Mirkwood?”_

_“I was Captain of the Guard.”_

_“What will you do now?”_

_“I do not know, my Lord. At the moment, I am helping to make Dale habitable. Come spring, I will see about joining the guard.”_

_“Well, my former captain has taken it upon himself to be the head of my personal guard. I find myself in need of a new Captain of the Guard. Perhaps you would be so kind as to fill the position?”_

_Tauriel looked at him with tears in her eyes. “Thank you, my Lord. I would be honored.”_

_“I am glad, my lady. But please, it is Fili, at least when we are out of court.”_

_“Very well…. Fili.”_

_End of Flashback_

Fili was about done with these two. “Let me see if I understand this correctly, Lord Mal; your son sold Lord Fen’s servant the pig, which was promptly butchered. You never intended the pig to be sold so you believe Lord Fen should give you recompense for emotional damage, as you were attached to said pig.”

“Yes, my Lord. Milly was like family.”

“Lord Mal, I do not see that Lord Fen is at fault here. It was your son who sold the pig. The pig was paid for. I believe this is a matter you need to take up with your son, not the royal court. You are both dismissed. Lord Balin, I am done for day.”

“Yes, your Majesty. I shall clear the court.”

Fili made to exit the throne room, Dwalin and Tauriel at his heels. “Well, that was about as much fun as a axe to the head,” said Dwalin.

“Don’t say that in front of the Ur’s, but I agree. Fili, you look pained.”

“I now understand why Thorin considered ale as medicine. Of all the absurd….”

“Why do you not set someone in charge of such matters? Thranduil always made Legolas deal with the frivolous matters.”

Fili and Dwalin stopped and look at the she elf. “I want to dismiss the idea because I don’t like Thranduil, but it has too much merit.”

“We can give credit to Dwalin. It will throw Balin for a loop and show he good for something besides brawn,” Tauriel teased.

Dwalin laughed. “Aye, but I do have a reputation to uphold, Lass. But I will gladly take the credit, this time.”

“Tauriel, we received work from Mirkwood this morning. Thranduil will be here by the end of this week.”

“You have decided to give him the jewels then?”

“Yes, it will be much wiser to to uphold the promise my forbearers gave than to continue to aggravate him. I can no longer claim to focus solely on reconstruction. It will be decades yet, before Erebor displays her full glory, but it is not so overwhelming now.”

“Am I to be in attendance?”

“Aye, Lass, you will. We get far too much amusement out of the face he makes when he sees you serving the King Under the Mountain.”

The friends chuckled as they made it to the Royal family’s private quarters. “The delegates from the Iron Hills will be arriving tomorrow,” said Balin as he joined them.

“Any idea of what Dain wants? It is not like him to send a delegation. He has always made his requests clear in his letters.”

“No idea, Lad. I am sure we will find out tomorrow. They will arrive fairly early, and Dain will want them to get things moving. How is your mother settling in? I am still surprised that she finally came back.”

Fili looked to Tauriel. Dis had spent far more time with her than anyone since her arrival the month before. Tauriel took her cue. “She walks daily to the tombs and spends a great deal of time there. The runestone is always on her person. I take lunch with her at least every other day, where she spends most of her time recounting stories of her boys and Thorin from years past. She is healing, but it will take a while. She lived in denial for almost two years.”

“Mother started taking breakfast with me this week, in our private dining room. She is not ready to interact with too many others though. Oin says it is good to let her set her own pace. If she stops showing signs of improvement, we will intervene.”

“Good, good. Well, we should prepare for dinner. I will see you all soon.”

All headed their own ways.


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is going obviously AU. I have changed a few things from the books and movies to suit my story. First, Tauriel was not all out in love with Kili. That will be explained a bit. I have something in mind for her. She will have a happy ending, and it will be with an elf that is not Legolas, though he does live in Tolkien's world. Second, I am pretty sure that any child Dain had wasn't born until after the events of the Hobbit, but in this story, he will have a couple of kids around Fili's age.

Fili sat in a meeting room, awaiting the delegates from the Iron Hills. Something was up. Dain made no qualms about Fili taking the crown. There were those who tried to deny him his right. They had all given their approval when Thorin claimed Kili and himself as his heirs, but when it actually came time, the nobles tried to cause problems. Dain was his biggest supporter. He stayed in regular contact and never hesitated to suggest or request anything in his letters. When they recieved a letter saying he was sending representatives for a sensitive matter, they were a bit alarmed. Another letter soon followed explaining that he was not offended over anything, but there was something he thought would benefit both their kingdoms. 

The door opening brought Fili out of his musings. Tauriel led the delegates in. After he motioned them to sit, they began. "Thank you for coming" said Fili, "though I do wonder what it is your lord feels warrents a delegation."

"We appreciate your hospitality, King Fili. Truly, you have done wonders to this mountain in a short amount of time," said Namin, one of Dain's most trusted advisors.  
"It is not I, but our craftsmen and other workers. Enough of the civilities, I prefer to get right to the point. What brings you here, Namin?"

"The security of the kingship."

"How is this Dain's problem?"

"He has been approached more and more with inquires and fears about your rule. You know this, for he makes sure to inform you, yes." Fili nods for him to continue. "You are the last of your line. Dain has no desire to take up this throne. He prefers his home in the Iron Hills. He wants to see your rule flourish."

"Ok, so I take it he has some plan for this he wants to propose to us?"

"Yes, your Majesty. You need to secure your line. He proposes that you marry and offers up his daughter, Dea, as your bride."

Fili felt like the room was closing in  
.   
"My King, you need to breathe," said Tauriel softly. She had been standing just behind him, to his right.   
Fili took a deep breath. "Marriage? This is Dain's solution."

"Yes, your Majesty. If you want to secure your throne, the best thing you can do is marry and start producing heirs. By marrying Dea, you would only strengthen your rule and your connections to the Iron Hills. None would be able to oppose you."

"Well, I think our King needs a little time to think about this. Did Dain give a time limit for an answer?" asked Balin.

"Not specifically, my lord. He knows that King Fili will want to think hard on this, and will need a little time, but he hopes we may come to an accord within a fortnight."  
"Yes, well, thank you, Namin. I encourage you to enjoy the hospitality of Erebor." 

Namin nodded and took his leave. Balin, Dwalin, and Tauriel watched their king and friend carefully. 

"Marriage? Balin, he can't be serious."

"Yes, he can, Lad."

"Do you agree with him? Do you think I should marry to secure my throne?"

"It would be a smart move. Thorin and Kili's deaths hit our people hard. Before, we had three in line for the throne. With their deaths, there was only you. Dain is next after you. He has his heir. His line is secure. As Namin said, you marrying Dain's daughter would give you the security you need right now, and could shut the naysayers up."

"Dwalin?"

"I am a warrior, not a politician. I defer to Balin in these matters."

"Tauriel, what say you?"

"Elves do not often marry for political reasons. We are long lived and only marry once. When we love, it runs deep. I do not think I can give you an answer. I do know that it is a practice used much in the Kingdoms of Men."

"What do we know of Lady Dea?" asked Fili.

"Dain has always been very proud of his children. He spouts their accomplishments from the battlements of every hold he ventures into, none more so than his own. His people adore her. She helps with the needy and orphans. She convinced her father decades ago to take charge of them. Seeing that they are kept off the streets. They are given purpose and their family seeks apprenticships for the dwarflings when they reach an age to begin learning a craft. The Iron Hills are very prospurous. Her hair and beard are described as being a deep red. She, of course, wears the braids of her house, but her beard only grows on her chin. She keeps in about 4 inches long and in a braid. She appears a bit more delicate than most dwarrowdams, but she is very strong and weilds a double headed axe, bigger than Dwalin's. Dain's wife has the blood of Men from a marriage contract with Gondor two generations ago. That explains her delicate figure and appearance. Her eyes have been described as being like the bluest sapphires...."

"Alright, Balin, I get it. I just... I need to think. Alone."

"Very well. Ya know where to find me should you need me."

As Balin exited the room, Dwalin traded looks with Tauriel before nodding and following after his brother.

"I take it you will be my shadow for the day?"

"Since you desire to be alone, yes. We cannot let you wander the mountain alone, but with my stealth, I can give you the appearance of it,' she asnwered with a smile.   
************************************************  
Fili wandered around the mountain for most of the day. Around lunch, he found a basket had appeared in his path. She was good. He sat on the battlements. After finishing his lunch, he decided to pay his mother a visit. 

"Hello, Amad."

"Fili, my son. What brings you to me at this time of day?"

"Can't a son visit his mother without questions?"

"Not with that look on his face."

Fili assessed his mother. She still looked a bit pale, and she had dark circles under her eyes, but there was a bit of a spark present too.

"Are you sure you are up for it? I will not stress you out."

"I have been uninvolved long enough. I do not think I will every fully heal from my losses, but you are still here. What is it?"

"Dain has been recieving many inquires on my rule. There are those trying to cause problems and there are those who are truly fearful for our line. He sent a delegation to us with what he considers a solution to our problem."

"What does Dain say?"

"He says I should marry and has offered his daughter, Dea, as my bride."

"Marriage. He thinks you should secure the line through marriage and the bearing heirs?"

"Yes."

"I hate to admit it, but it is probably the best solution."

"So says Balin."

"And you?"

"I have come to the conclusion that life is very unfair. I know it is the best solution, I just don't like it. I always thought I would marry for love, not because I had to secure my throne. I also thought I would not have had to marry for many years." 

"And if Thorin had lived, you would have had that privilege." 

"I don't really think I have a choice here, do I Amad? I will have to marry, whether it be to Lady Dea or another noble dwarrowdam picked for me."

"I am guessing Balin knew at least a little about the Lady Dea?"

Fili told his mother all Balin had said. Dis nodded as she listened. "So, she sounds as though she would be the ideal queen?"

"Yes. If all that is said of her is true, she would almost be the perfect candidate. The only negative would be her blood, but even that is easily dismissed. He great grandmother was the daughter of a Steward of Gondor."

"Hard to argue against that. So, you have made your decision?"

"Yes. I will accept Dain's offer. I will secure my throne. You know, I always thought the Thorin would marry after we reclaimed the Mountain, and have his own heirs. I never really thought it would come to me."

"I believe we all thought that. I am sorry, my son, that this burden falls on you."

"But your not sorry it means you shall soon have grandchildren to spoil," Fili said with a smile. He thought it was nice to be able to laugh with his mother again.   
**************************************************  
Fili waited three days before he discussed his decision with anyone. When he did, it was Tauriel that he confided in.

"If this is the course you believe you should take, you have my total support."

"Thank you, Tauriel. I expected nothing else from you."

They sat in silence for a while, looking out towrds Dale from the battlements. Fili turned to observe his friend for a moment. His curiosity got the better of him.

"Tauriel, do you think you shall ever marry? You once said that you thought you could have loved my brother, but it was too soon for you to know."

"I do not know. I came close to giving my heart to Kili, even though I had known him a short time. In his delirium, he asked if I could love him. I couldn't answer. I couldn't say yes or no. I cared. I didn't want him to die. I desired to see what could be between us. If I do, I do not believe it will be anytime soon."

"How do you know you did not love him?"

"When an elf experiences the loss of a spouse, and sometimes a child, they often fall deeply into despair. They fade. Pass away from this world in their grief. If they sail, they are spared that fate, or if they have a strong ancor. For Thranduil, it was his son, Legolas. It is why he is so cold hearted. It prevented his fading. He lives for his son and his people. My heart hurt, but I did not despair. I healed. I cared, I still do. There are some things that will stay with you, and he is one of them for me."

"I hope you find happiness one day, Tauriel. I know he would want it."

"Thank you, Fili. When do you plan to announce your decision?"

"In about an hour. I sent a message to Balin before you and Dwalin switched off, " he said with a cheeky grin.

"Namin shall be pleased."

"Yes, he shall. I imagine he will have a raven sent out to Dain as soon as he leaves the meeting."  
***************************************************  
"Have you come to a decision, King Fili."

"Yes, Namin. After much consideration, I have decided to accept Dain's proposal. With his blessing, I shall wed his daughter, Dea. I only ask that she spend the winter here, that we may get to know one another. I do not desire to be strangers on our wedding day."

"Of course, your Majesty. I am sure that can be arranged. I shall write Lord Dain immediatly," he said excitedly, and a bit relieved. 

When he was once more alone with his closest advisors, he let out a long breath. "It is done, then."

"I am proud of you, Fili. I know this hasn't been easy on you. Thorin would be proud as well. You are thinking and acting like a king," said Balin. "I will go and start arranging things. I imagine Dain will not be long in coming. Winter will set in soon."

"Be sure and include my mother in that, Balin. She has expressed her desire to be more involved and this is certainly something she will want to have a say in."

"Glad to hear it."

"I shall hand pick a few guards to intigrate into their own people. I have no doubt that she will come with her own guards, but I doubt they will all stay once you are married. She will need time to adjust to new people in her space."

"Thank you, Tauriel. I did not think of that."

Fili and Tauriel looked at Dwalin. He grunted and crossed his arms.

"I will do what I do best; follow your behind and make sure you don't find trouble and trouble doesn't find you."


End file.
